The Buddha repeatedly taught that we should regard ourselves and others by the consequences of our actions (including our speech) and not by our appearances. And yet, most of us evaluate and compare ourselves by our appearances all of the time. Why is that? In this podcast, we will talk about the association of power and appearance, and especially how the nature of being human, of being homo sapiens, involves us relentlessly comparing ourselves to others, typically finding ourselves lacking, and then feeling resentful. As Leonard Cohen famously said in his hymn “If It Be Your Will”:
Draw us near, and bind us tight, all your children here, in their rags of light. In our rags of light, all dressed to kill, and end this night, if it be your will.
In this podcast we will talk about both our “rags of light” and the power of appearance in human relationships.
Polly and Jill continue their conversation with psychoanalyst Robert Caper (expert on projective identification) about the emotional kidnapping and confusion that occur in unconscious...
What allows us to feel comfortable in ourselves with others? What does it mean to feel like we "belong"? Can we do this without...
Humiliation is the experience of being exposed in our weaknesses and losing our social status in a couple or group. Being humiliated naturally evokes...